My friend Avery called me to talk about his new boss, Jill.

"The first three months working under her, I told everyone, 'She's nice,'" Avery told me.

"I couldn't get a read on her. Then, the other day, she calls me into her office. She says, 'I guess you're the up-and-comer on the team.'

"I didn't know how to respond. I said, 'I like my job. I like the projects I'm working on.'

"Then she says, 'I see that you're well-regarded and that you're confident. Now we need to give you the business skills to match your confidence level.'"

"Whoa!" I said. "What did you say then?"

"I said, 'I am always looking to develop my business skills. Is there any area in particular where you think I could be stronger?'

"She said, 'You could benefit from my mentoring.' She didn't get more specific than that. What a weird thing to say!

"Also, she said, 'You need my direction,' and then when I asked, she couldn't mention one specific thing that would have had a better result if she'd been involved. It kills her that I'm confident. I've been in the job four years. I have a lot to learn and I know it.

"I can see that Jill is more comfortable around people who can't make a move without her direction."

I thought back to the scene in "The Producers" (modern version) where Jon Lovitz, playing the evil boss, asks, "Do I smell the revolting stench of self-esteem?" I'm sure Jill is a bit more subtle. There are managers who get very nervous around employees who don't look to a boss for permission do their jobs.

It's not difficult to see why this should be. Some managers fear that the only power they've got is the power of their position. They don't have, or perhaps haven't cultivated, the personal power that comes from credibility, good listening, good judgment and integrity.

So they rely on the power of the title, and require people to get advice, permission and approval from them. They thrive on that need for their approval. Managers like Jill haven't discovered that the strongest leaders hire people smarter than themselves and turn them loose.

It's a funny thing about mentoring -- it works really well when mentees are looking for guidance and mentors are available to give it.

Typically, when a manager thinks a subordinate needs direction, he or she will say, "We could work on your financial-analysis skills" or "I'd love to help you be a stronger presenter."

A manager who says, "See me before you make a move" and, "You'd benefit from my (non-specific) mentoring" is a manager whose employees won't make great things happen, because their leashes are too short.

I'm not sure whether Avery will stick it out or go in search of a manager who's not intimidated by competence and confidence. As for Jill, I hope she learns that it's career-limiting for a manager to hire people who can't work independently.

Folks like Avery don't tend to stick around long enough under managers like Jill to get that lesson across.

Liz Ryan is the CEO of Ask Liz Ryan, a Boulder human-resources and organizational strategy consulting firm. She can be reached at liz@asklizryan.com.